Baci: No, I gets to tell the camping story. First, Mom and Dad loaded us into our new carrier. It was blue to match my …
Dolce: I gets to tell the story. I am the oldest, therefore I will be the one to tell the story.
Baci: But I’m the cutest. You even think I’m incorrigible.
Dolce: Baci. That doesn’t mean cute. I lied.
Baci: Oooh! You’re going to get it when Dad finds out.
Since both Dolce and Baci came with us, it wouldn’t be fair to let only Dolce or only Baci tell the story of the Great Montana Camping Trip. I will only set out the itinerary for the trip and then I will let BOTH Dolce and Baci tell you what they did that day. Given that they are both excitable cats, still more kitten than cat, the story might get a little bit long. So here goes the story of the Great Montana Camping Adventure:
DAY ONE: LEAVING HOME
Dolce: Once Dad got the Rumbly Truck attached to the House-On-Wheels, Mom said good-bye to Magoo and Bella and carried us out to the Rumbly Truck.
Baci: We got put into a new carrier that Dad had attched to the back seat. He said it was for safety reasons.
Dolce: Baci let me finish my part first.
Baci: Fine.
Dolce: Once we got into the Rumbly Truck, I told Dad that I needed to help with the navigation. Actually I told him that a lot, and quite loudly too. He said that I couldn’t help with navigation until we got out of the city. He said it wasn’t safe with so many Jaskasses on the road.
Baci: What’s a jackass?
Dolce: Kinda like a vishus deer but they are way stoopider. At least vishus deer don’t pretend to know how to drive.
Baci: Oh yeah. Those jackasses were scarey.
Dolce: Dad finally let us out of the carrier and we drove to Uncle Gruffy McGruffypants’ house. He likes me lots. While Mom and Dad and Aunty and Uncle were talking, I curled up on the couch and slept while Uncle kept playing with my dainty little paws.
Baci: I tolded Aunty McGruffypants how happy I was to meet her. I told her that lots as I followed her around the kitchen. I asked if she had any chick-hen. Dad told me not to beg, but did say that I could have some of the chick-hen that Uncle McGruffypants had made. It was so delicious.
DAY TWO: HEADING TO MONTANA
Dolce: I forgot to mention that we met my cousin Odie-cat. She didn’t like us very much, but then she is very old, almost 17 years.
Baci: Yeah, she hisses very loudly. I pooped in her litterbox.
Dolce: Mom and Dad put us into the Rumbly Truck and we headed south towards America. We got to roam around the truck, but we had to stay away from Dad’s feets and the pedalls.
Baci: Cats can get squished by the pedalls.
Dolce: So we had to talk to a Border Guard. She said that she needed to see our papers.
Baci: I asked if she wanted the ones I peed on or the pooped on ones.
Dolce: She didn’t think that was very funny. I told her to arrest my brofur for being stoopid.
Baci: If stoopid is a crime, you should get a life sentence. Oops, I think you are violating your parole by being stoopid right now.
Dolce: I’m going to tell Dad. Maybe he let me finish the story by myself.
Baci: No, I gets to help.
Dolce: So we drove to the campground in Kalispell, Montana. It was furry nice. Mom and Dad turned on the AC in the House-on-Wheels and gave us our holiday toys.
Baci: Then I had a really bad poop.
Dolce: Baci had some very sticky poops. Mom and Dad were worried that the food wasn’t good anymore. But I didn’t get any poops just Baci.
DAY THREE: CAMPING
Dolce: WE finally got to check out the campsite. It wasn’t huge but it wasn’t too bad. The people around us were pretty nice, even though they seem to like Baci better.
Baci: Good taste. They all just had good taste.
Dolce: I don’t think so. If they knew how much you pooted and how stinky your butt was last night, they would not think you were very cute at all.
Baci: I was having some problems. I think it was because I don’t get enough chick-hen.
Dolce: Mom and Dad put our new carrier outside so that we could get used to the new place.
Baci: It didn’t take long. I wanted to go exploring right away.
DAYS FOUR to SEVEN: OUR CAMPSITE
Dolce: Mom and Dad went out for some people fun. Mom calls it golf, Dad calls it something else. Especially when he is having a bad game.
Baci: Dolce! You said a four letter word.
Dolce: What four letter word?
Baci: Golf!
Dolce: Mom and Dad came home and let us outside to explore the campsite some more.
Baci: Lots of people came by and freaked out when they saw us on our leashes.
Dolce: Some very nice people came by and said hello to us. One or two mentioned how cute Baci was. I sure hope the rest of the country isn’t as delusional as these people.
Baci: You are just jealous because I’m more incorrigible than you.
Dolce: I told you Baci, that that doesn’t mean cute.
Baci:Yup. More jealousy!
Dolce: Our Dad saw some ominous clouds billowing over the mountains. He tried to scare Mom and us that it was a volcano exploding. Mom believed him but I didn’t. It was just a forest fire that sprang up.
Baci: I didn’t believe him either.
Dolce: Yes you did. You pooped when you heard him say volcano.
Baci: I might have pooped but it was not because Dad said volcano. I was still having some tummy problems.
Dolce: Dad showed me his pictures and I nearly pooped like Baci. There was a picture of a vishus deer on one of the golf courses. It was laying in wait for a nice tender joosy cat to wander by.
Baci: I saw it and I did poop.
DAY EIGHT: TOO MUCH HOT
Dolce: It was very hot. Almost twice as hot as it is at home. Thankfully we were inside with the AC. Mom made Dad take her to Missoula so that she could go shopping in some of the bigger stores.
Baci: I think she bought half the state back with her.
Dolce: It’s a girl thing. You would’t understand.
Baci: Nope. A couple furry mice, some catnip and a comfy place to sleep is all I need.
Dolce: Boys!
Baci: Did you say something?
DAY NINE: GOING TO UNCLE GRUFFY’S PLACE
Dolce: We had to stay inside the trailer while Dad was packing up outside.
Baci: Once he was done, I got to go outside. I pooped in the firepit.
Dolce: Once we got back to Canada,we got to see Aunty and Uncle again. I was very tired from our vaction so I hid downstairs where it was cool.
Baci: I followed Aunty around. She saved me some chick-hen so I was very happy. She keeps calling me Bocce-ball. I tried to tell her that’s not how I spell my name, but she doesn’t speak cat very well. I think it’s because of Odie-cat’s accent.
DAY TEN: WE’S HOME!
Dolce: I talked to Dad almost the entire way home. He says he was getting a headache. If he would just drive the way I wanted, I wouldn’t have to talk so much.
Baci: I slept on top of my carrier. I was very, very cute. That’s what Dad said to Mom.
Click to biggify